Inspiron 11-3147 2-in-1 BIOS Beeps Issue

Background:

I recently pulled an Inspiron 11-3147 2-in-1 out of mothballs after 12-18 months. I received the laptop for free through Time Warner as a promotion and never found it powerful enough for day-to-day use (I always suspected TW had the machines custom built with reduced specs to make them cheaper). My idea now is to wipe the hard drive, install Ubuntu, and use it as a high-powered e-reader/internet browser when I don't need to be doing anything productive.

Issue:

When I turned the laptop on for the first time in 12-18 months, it beeped loudly, and nothing appeared on the screen. I had plugged it in only a few minutes before, so I assumed it just didn't have the juice to do anything and that the beeps were a critical battery alarm. After charging for a few hours, I tried again. Same beeps, but this time the system did boot as normal and I was able to log in.

Now knowing that the beeps weren't related to the battery, I reset the computer and paid attention: 5 beeps. Looking in the manual, I found that 5 beeps at startup indicated an internal clock power failure that could be fixed by replacing the button-cell battery on the motherboard. I purchased a replacement battery, swapped it in, and turned the system on. No change. Same beeps.

That's the short version of the main issue. If there's something simple I'm missing, like resetting the alarm somehow or some other step that wouldn't be included in the manual for some reason, let me know. I have taken the system apart a second time to check that the battery is seated properly. I took a photo of the original battery before removing it, so I'm fairly certain I've idiot-proofed the install. I never rule out things like that, though, so if you can think of anything in the realm of silly mistakes, be sure to throw it out there.

Here are some other things I noticed that might serve as clues if there isn't a clear-cut answer/if I'm misdiagnosing the issue:

- The BIOS beeps are different than what I've heard on other systems. They are long-ish beeps and very loud, akin to a truck backing up. They are loud enough that I generally walk away from the device/put it in another room with the door closed after turning it on.

- The sequence of 5-beeps often repeats two or three times, with the last set of five sometimes getting cut off. Occasionally (I've turned the system on and endured the beeps maybe 10 times), the sequence of beeps sounds like it gets cut off before it gets to 5 even the first time, but 5 beeps is the most consistent number. Other BIOS beep issues in the manual seem like they would prevent Windows from loading, so I haven't looked into them.

- When I've left the system on and played around to see if I can find other issues, I've also found that the system no longer recognized the internal wireless adapter. I can find it in the device manager if I turn on hidden devices, but the status says it isn't connected. I have removed and reseated the wireless adapter, but that did not fix the issue. The button-cell battery and the wireless adapter are right next to each other inside the laptop, but I see no evidence of physical/moisture/electrical damage anywhere. I also don't see how the wireless adapter and the battery connection could short out while leaving seemingly everything else intact, but I suppose stranger things have happened.

Please chime in with any ideas/suggestions!