How Long Does It Take To Fix?

I am now going on 3 weeks with a D.O.A. i9100.  I'm sure that the phone charges that Dell has incurred alone and ppl salaries have exceeded the cost of my laptop. My i9100 just shut down on July 1st and after 2 on site service calls, 2 motherboards, a new processor and new memory I'm told the laptop has to be sent to a depot somewhere.  Franklin (a tech rep in India) gave me a phone number and told me to call DHL to get a box & label to return the unit. That it will take 8 days in house to repair, thus adding at least 2 weeks onto the 3 weeks that I've been without so far.  My call to DHL (and the next 3 calls to other numbers provided by customer and tech support) proved useless since DHL stated that all calls for Dell returns had to originate from Dell.  Further telephone calls and on-line chats with Dell promised me that everyone that I either conversed verbally or in written form would take "ownership" of my situation.  Well after another 8 hours over 2 more days on the phone and speaking with managers in India and Philippines, more ppl vowed "ownership".  My laptop still is sitting here, no "special" box to ship it in, no "special" labeling to place on the box and no laptop.  I guess the Complete Care contract and Next Business Day service contract that I have can't get this laptop fixed.  So here we are, still trying to figure out where Texas, Tennessee is located since that's where I was told the unit has to go (last I looked, these were 2 different states?).  All I expect is first class customer service and when a promise is made, that it is kept.  Why did I purchase the in-home contract, if I'm now being told that I have to send it out to a depot?  And even though I don't cherish the idea of sending it out, why is it being made so difficult to do so?  I don't understand why it will be at least 5 weeks (in reality more) to get something like this fixed, when it probably only takes an hour or less to build it new?  I'm not sure if this a true forum type posting, but the aggravation and disappointment level is so high that it takes the "edge" off of it all to type about it.  So let's see if the newest number provided to me to contact DHL directly will work.